1 00:00:06,366 --> 00:00:07,866 - The world is my home, 2 00:00:07,900 --> 00:00:09,966 and I just go wherever I want to go. 3 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,433 I can wander around and see so many things 4 00:00:12,466 --> 00:00:14,733 and meet so many people. 5 00:00:14,766 --> 00:00:17,433 Being lost is where I'm found. 6 00:00:17,466 --> 00:00:19,100 female narrator: Filmmaker Nanfu Wang joins 7 00:00:19,133 --> 00:00:22,433 drifter, Dylan, on his adventure of self-discovery... 8 00:00:22,466 --> 00:00:25,466 - Anywhere I am, something likely amazing happens. 9 00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:27,766 - So you're from Utah you said? - Yeah. 10 00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:30,233 narrator: Leaving all expectations behind 11 00:00:30,266 --> 00:00:32,100 to find the true cost of freedom. 12 00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:36,366 - The first time he called me, he said, "Guess where I'm at. 13 00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:37,466 Malibu." 14 00:00:37,500 --> 00:00:40,133 I'm proud of Dylan, 15 00:00:40,166 --> 00:00:43,833 but I think to myself, "What are you doing, kid?" 16 00:00:43,866 --> 00:00:46,833 No parent wants their child to be homeless. 17 00:00:46,866 --> 00:00:48,266 - I really couldn't answer and say 18 00:00:48,300 --> 00:00:50,233 when I'll be done traveling in this way. 19 00:00:50,266 --> 00:00:52,400 narrator: "I am Another You," 20 00:00:52,433 --> 00:00:55,300 now only on "Independent Lens." 21 00:00:58,333 --> 00:01:05,466 ♪ 22 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:19,466 ♪ 23 00:01:50,533 --> 00:01:57,600 ♪ 24 00:02:23,233 --> 00:02:30,266 ♪ 25 00:03:10,866 --> 00:03:13,633 - I left China in 2011. 26 00:03:16,933 --> 00:03:18,766 I left to find something 27 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:23,300 I'd been searching for all my life. 28 00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:27,066 Along the way I've learned I'm not the only one looking. 29 00:03:40,533 --> 00:03:44,233 Traveling was one of the few freedoms I knew in China. 30 00:03:46,666 --> 00:03:49,200 Every year since I was 20 years old, 31 00:03:49,233 --> 00:03:53,166 I would celebrate my birthday by traveling to a new place. 32 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,400 I started this tradition in China. 33 00:03:57,433 --> 00:03:59,733 On my first birthday living in New York, 34 00:03:59,766 --> 00:04:03,800 I bought a one-way ticket and went to Florida. 35 00:04:07,266 --> 00:04:11,000 I was excited to document every conversation I had. 36 00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:12,866 - Welcome to America. Like, this is-- 37 00:04:12,900 --> 00:04:14,566 This is what America is like. 38 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:17,733 - Since I was a teen, I just wanted to grab a backpack 39 00:04:17,766 --> 00:04:19,133 and go travel, you know, 40 00:04:19,166 --> 00:04:20,766 not know where I'm going to sleep 41 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:22,666 or who I'm gonna be with. That excited me. 42 00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:25,333 - Tell me what's your next plan, travel. 43 00:04:25,366 --> 00:04:28,800 - I'm going to South America for six months. 44 00:04:31,666 --> 00:04:34,000 - A few days in to the trip, 45 00:04:34,033 --> 00:04:36,500 I stayed at a hostel where I met someone 46 00:04:36,533 --> 00:04:39,666 whose mode of travel was different from anyone I knew. 47 00:04:49,633 --> 00:04:52,233 - Oh, it feels so good though. 48 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:01,900 - Yeah! 49 00:05:05,366 --> 00:05:07,433 - How do you spell your name? 50 00:05:09,666 --> 00:05:13,600 - D-Y-L-A-N. 51 00:05:13,633 --> 00:05:15,833 - Dylan? - Dylan. 52 00:05:15,866 --> 00:05:17,500 - And your last name? 53 00:05:17,533 --> 00:05:18,966 - Olsen. 54 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:21,600 O-L-S-E-N. 55 00:05:21,633 --> 00:05:24,700 - The first night I met Dylan, we talked for hours 56 00:05:24,733 --> 00:05:27,333 about our lives and travels. 57 00:05:27,366 --> 00:05:31,533 What did you have when you first, like, got on the road? 58 00:05:31,566 --> 00:05:34,166 - An empty backpack and no money. 59 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,533 I just began to travel across the country. 60 00:05:36,566 --> 00:05:40,933 - How can you pay the hostel if you don't have money? 61 00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:44,166 - I work for them. 62 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:49,500 I came here offering my work for a place 63 00:05:49,533 --> 00:05:52,800 to close my eyes at night that was safe 64 00:05:52,833 --> 00:05:56,733 and a place to just be at peace. 65 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:12,466 ♪ 66 00:06:17,766 --> 00:06:20,100 - So many people come and go, it's hard to remember. 67 00:06:20,133 --> 00:06:22,066 I do know that when I first met Dylan, 68 00:06:22,100 --> 00:06:24,933 I immediately identified he was a street kid. 69 00:06:24,966 --> 00:06:26,600 - How? 70 00:06:26,633 --> 00:06:29,300 - Just because he's a street kid. 71 00:06:29,333 --> 00:06:30,833 You know, you meet so many people, 72 00:06:30,866 --> 00:06:34,400 you can see certain things, it's evident, 73 00:06:34,433 --> 00:06:36,933 and so we had a conversation 74 00:06:36,966 --> 00:06:39,366 and made the agreement that he would leave 75 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:45,233 all those survival skills of the street behind. 76 00:06:45,266 --> 00:06:48,300 They have no place here. 77 00:06:48,333 --> 00:06:50,733 We identified that immediately, 78 00:06:50,766 --> 00:06:54,800 and it's very rare that we'll allow that, but he's unique. 79 00:06:54,833 --> 00:06:57,366 Very smart, very creative. 80 00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:01,533 He's got one of the best skills that you can have: 81 00:07:01,566 --> 00:07:05,466 fearless in working, fearless in doing. 82 00:07:41,466 --> 00:07:45,366 - This is a very beautiful cage, don't get me wrong, 83 00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:48,100 but it is a cage. 84 00:08:13,366 --> 00:08:15,100 ♪ 85 00:08:15,133 --> 00:08:17,033 - I wanted to experience the life 86 00:08:17,066 --> 00:08:19,100 that Dylan described to me. 87 00:08:19,133 --> 00:08:21,200 When he went back to the streets, 88 00:08:21,233 --> 00:08:24,000 I decided to follow him with my camera 89 00:08:24,033 --> 00:08:26,433 despite the fact that I hardly knew him. 90 00:08:26,466 --> 00:08:30,200 ♪ 91 00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:38,400 woman: It says "no entry." 92 00:08:47,266 --> 00:08:49,333 - We need a better map. 93 00:08:57,166 --> 00:08:59,666 Being lost is where I'm found. 94 00:09:03,033 --> 00:09:06,600 Upon arriving, the path that I'm happy to tread 95 00:09:06,633 --> 00:09:08,566 when my shoes come off 96 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:11,800 and I experience that full connection with the floor, 97 00:09:11,833 --> 00:09:14,733 it's as if I can breathe better, 98 00:09:14,766 --> 00:09:18,433 observing everybody else around in their entirety, 99 00:09:18,466 --> 00:09:22,733 their passions, their bizarre behaviors, 100 00:09:22,766 --> 00:09:27,066 as well as their observing me and my bizarre behaviors. 101 00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:34,166 ♪ 102 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:46,666 There's no time living in this sense. 103 00:09:46,700 --> 00:09:49,033 I don't know what day it is. 104 00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:51,933 Every day is now. Right now. 105 00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:54,200 Every time is right now. 106 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:01,933 - I taught Dylan how to use my camera 107 00:10:01,966 --> 00:10:04,600 so he could document my experience as well. 108 00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:15,233 This was the first time I ate food from a garbage can. 109 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,200 It was the beginning of my short street life. 110 00:10:20,233 --> 00:10:27,300 ♪ 111 00:10:35,466 --> 00:10:38,533 - Wherever he goes, he leaves an echo to show. 112 00:10:38,566 --> 00:10:40,833 From the pitter-patter of his feet 113 00:10:40,866 --> 00:10:43,433 to the magic incantation he speaks, 114 00:10:43,466 --> 00:10:47,366 a man from the past living in the present 115 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:50,433 so his presence is living in the future, 116 00:10:50,466 --> 00:10:53,166 yesterday, and tomorrow. 117 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:55,733 Last week was seven years long. 118 00:10:55,766 --> 00:11:02,900 ♪ 119 00:12:00,266 --> 00:12:02,433 - A year? - Mm-hmm. 120 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:15,466 - Why you choose to be on the street? 121 00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:16,566 - Hmm? 122 00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:17,966 - Why you choose to stay on the street? 123 00:12:22,533 --> 00:12:24,600 - Well... - Huh? 124 00:12:24,633 --> 00:12:29,966 - I guess the only objective is eating, 125 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:33,766 happiness, and community. 126 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:36,533 - What do you mean? Eating? 127 00:12:36,566 --> 00:12:39,300 - I mean, I feed myself, 128 00:12:39,333 --> 00:12:42,333 and I keep a good attitude, 129 00:12:42,366 --> 00:12:46,000 and... 130 00:12:46,033 --> 00:12:47,700 kinda just go wherever I want to go. 131 00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:50,200 You wander around and see so many things 132 00:12:50,233 --> 00:12:51,533 and meet so many people 133 00:12:51,566 --> 00:12:53,966 that none of that could ever occur 134 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:58,133 if I were just staying in one place 135 00:12:58,166 --> 00:12:59,866 working for one person. 136 00:12:59,900 --> 00:13:04,533 I've gone through quite a big portion of North America. 137 00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:07,733 I'm just exploring. I'm just meeting people. 138 00:13:07,766 --> 00:13:10,000 Hey, man, you got a Sharpie? 139 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:13,866 I really couldn't answer 140 00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:15,766 and say when I'll be done traveling 141 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:19,033 or living on the street in this way, 142 00:13:19,066 --> 00:13:22,833 but anywhere I am, something likely amazing happens. 143 00:13:26,066 --> 00:13:28,700 - My name is Jared. - Jared? 144 00:13:28,733 --> 00:13:32,233 - And this my brother here, John. 145 00:13:32,266 --> 00:13:34,333 - Hello. - My name is Dylan. 146 00:13:34,366 --> 00:13:36,366 - Dylan, nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you, man. 147 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:38,266 - Yeah. - My name is Nanfu. 148 00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:41,033 N-A-N-F-U. - That's cool. 149 00:13:41,066 --> 00:13:43,566 So you're from Utah you said, originally? 150 00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:45,600 - Yeah. Yeah. - What part did you say? 151 00:13:45,633 --> 00:13:47,433 - Just north of Salt Lake City. 152 00:13:47,466 --> 00:13:49,100 - Oh, did you grow up Mormon? 153 00:13:49,133 --> 00:13:52,866 - Yeah. For a minute. 154 00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:55,433 - For a hot minute? - Yeah. For a hot minute. 155 00:13:55,466 --> 00:13:57,500 - You're welcome to stay the night. 156 00:13:57,533 --> 00:13:59,966 - Neat. - That's a pullout. 157 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:05,800 - She needs a good rest, so--she's earned it. 158 00:14:05,833 --> 00:14:08,266 - One of the first people to buy here, like 1960-something-- 159 00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:11,366 - Jared had known us for just a few hours. 160 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:14,366 - You guys want a beer? - But he invited us home. 161 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:17,866 It had been days since I slept under a roof. 162 00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:19,066 - So I've been there. 163 00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:21,000 You know, I've been traveling by myself. 164 00:14:21,033 --> 00:14:22,666 I've had no place to stay, so I just figured 165 00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:25,933 I'd extend a hand, and I like him, you know? 166 00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:27,766 You know, he's a funny cat, man. 167 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,800 You know, he's young. He's finding himself. 168 00:14:30,833 --> 00:14:34,800 It's tough living a life on the street and on the roads. 169 00:14:34,833 --> 00:14:37,600 - Jared took us to dinner that night. 170 00:14:37,633 --> 00:14:42,066 I told myself one day I'd come back and thank him, 171 00:14:42,100 --> 00:14:44,333 but I don't even remember where he lived. 172 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:50,900 - Am I in the camera? - Yeah. 173 00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:52,433 - A beer, right? - A Budweiser please. 174 00:14:52,466 --> 00:14:53,666 - Budweiser? - Thank you. 175 00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:02,500 Oh, okay. 176 00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:36,233 Oh, okay. 177 00:15:40,066 --> 00:15:42,100 Oh, yeah, yeah. 178 00:15:43,466 --> 00:15:46,966 - I hadn't told my family that I was living on the street 179 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:51,800 with someone I just met and wasn't involved with. 180 00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:54,333 They wouldn't understand why a homeless person 181 00:15:54,366 --> 00:15:56,433 would be worth following. 182 00:15:56,466 --> 00:15:59,400 The idea that someone would choose to be homeless 183 00:15:59,433 --> 00:16:01,866 would be inconceivable to them, 184 00:16:01,900 --> 00:16:03,933 but this was a kind of freedom 185 00:16:03,966 --> 00:16:06,266 I had never encountered before. 186 00:16:12,766 --> 00:16:14,533 Everywhere we went, 187 00:16:14,566 --> 00:16:16,433 I was amazed by how many people 188 00:16:16,466 --> 00:16:18,266 were interested in this life. 189 00:16:18,300 --> 00:16:19,566 - Dy-lan or Dylan? - Dylan. 190 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:20,833 - Dylan. - Yeah. 191 00:16:20,866 --> 00:16:22,833 - How long are you planning to do this? 192 00:16:22,866 --> 00:16:26,600 - I don't know, man. I have no idea. 193 00:16:26,633 --> 00:16:28,600 I'll see where the road takes me. 194 00:16:28,633 --> 00:16:30,766 - I'm just fascinated, so what made you-- 195 00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:32,533 like, did someone else do this 196 00:16:32,566 --> 00:16:34,366 that you decided to do it, or--? 197 00:16:34,400 --> 00:16:37,266 - I wondered if the presence of my camera 198 00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:39,100 affected how people behaved, 199 00:16:39,133 --> 00:16:42,033 so sometimes I would retreat from Dylan 200 00:16:42,066 --> 00:16:46,166 and wait until something happened. 201 00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:49,566 This guy met Dylan in front of a coffee shop 202 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,866 while I was sitting inside charging my battery. 203 00:16:52,900 --> 00:16:54,966 They talked for hours, 204 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,266 and then he invited Dylan to his home. 205 00:16:57,300 --> 00:16:59,300 - We were just carrying a conversation, 206 00:16:59,333 --> 00:17:01,633 and we got something in common with a hostel. 207 00:17:01,666 --> 00:17:04,366 I stayed in a hostel when I was in California. 208 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:08,300 I just decided doesn't hurt to have some money if you can. 209 00:17:08,333 --> 00:17:11,033 It just makes me feel good to be able to-- 210 00:17:11,066 --> 00:17:13,700 Makes me feel good if I can help somebody. 211 00:17:13,733 --> 00:17:17,066 - What part of his story interested you? 212 00:17:17,099 --> 00:17:23,566 - Well, I guess the way-- choices he makes. 213 00:17:23,599 --> 00:17:28,266 - Street life was free and exciting for Dylan, 214 00:17:28,300 --> 00:17:30,800 but it wasn't that way for everyone. 215 00:17:34,533 --> 00:17:38,900 Why were people so generous to Dylan but not to the others? 216 00:17:42,033 --> 00:17:44,933 I began to realize the privilege of choosing 217 00:17:44,966 --> 00:17:48,833 to be on the streets, which includes both of us. 218 00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,766 Thank you. 219 00:18:51,733 --> 00:18:54,266 Who came to hear Ember play tonight? 220 00:18:56,433 --> 00:18:58,466 - Did anybody come to meet with God tonight? 221 00:19:01,366 --> 00:19:02,866 Well, we are glad that you chose 222 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:03,966 to come here tonight. 223 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:05,633 Who has been here before 224 00:19:05,666 --> 00:19:08,366 and decided they might come back again? 225 00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:11,100 All right, well, I think we're in the right place. 226 00:19:11,133 --> 00:19:12,800 So let's pray over the meal. 227 00:19:12,833 --> 00:19:14,266 Father, I thank you for tonight. 228 00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:16,066 I thank you for... 229 00:19:16,100 --> 00:19:17,600 - I just love-- I love humanity. 230 00:19:17,633 --> 00:19:20,200 I'm here experiencing humanity in its fullest. 231 00:19:20,233 --> 00:19:24,066 - Do you have, like, any type of, like, 232 00:19:24,100 --> 00:19:26,000 legal issues in your background 233 00:19:26,033 --> 00:19:28,766 that would, you know, add-- 234 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,133 I'm just curious-- to like-- 235 00:19:30,166 --> 00:19:31,933 - Nothing extreme. - Okay. 236 00:19:31,966 --> 00:19:34,600 - I mean, I made a lot of mistakes. 237 00:19:34,633 --> 00:19:37,533 By the time I was 14, I was on heroin and selling drugs 238 00:19:37,566 --> 00:19:39,566 until about 20 years old. 239 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,033 - I mean, I'm assuming you probably have maybe 240 00:19:42,066 --> 00:19:43,566 some high school or you may have finished high school. 241 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,466 - Yeah, I finished high school, did some college. 242 00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:46,533 - Okay. Okay. 243 00:19:46,566 --> 00:19:48,933 - I quit college 'cause, I mean, 244 00:19:48,966 --> 00:19:50,700 I can learn more in a library 245 00:19:50,733 --> 00:19:52,166 than I could at a school, 246 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:53,666 studying what I'm interested in for free. 247 00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:55,300 - Yeah, the point I'm trying to bring out 248 00:19:55,333 --> 00:20:00,066 is that it's gonna be that much harder for you 249 00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:03,066 basically putting this on your resume 250 00:20:03,100 --> 00:20:04,600 when you're trying to get a job. 251 00:20:04,633 --> 00:20:06,333 I mean, I'm having a hard enough time myself. 252 00:20:06,366 --> 00:20:08,300 - I don't feel as if I'm doing wrong. 253 00:20:08,333 --> 00:20:10,400 Maybe I'm doing different than anybody else 254 00:20:10,433 --> 00:20:11,600 would think, but, man, I'm-- 255 00:20:11,633 --> 00:20:13,800 - Right. No, no it's-- - I'm whole. 256 00:20:13,833 --> 00:20:15,233 - Right. No, I'm not saying you're doing wrong. 257 00:20:15,266 --> 00:20:16,433 - I know that. I know. 258 00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:17,600 - But, yeah, no, I'm just saying, you know-- 259 00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:19,566 - Just telling you how I feel about it. 260 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,700 - You know, it just seems like, you know, 261 00:20:21,733 --> 00:20:25,400 like, the easier way out. 262 00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:27,933 - Well, for now I'm only 22. 263 00:20:27,966 --> 00:20:31,733 I feel like a 70-year old person, 100-year old person. 264 00:20:31,766 --> 00:20:34,833 I mean, I've been through a lot. 265 00:20:34,866 --> 00:20:36,333 I've lived through a lot and experienced 266 00:20:36,366 --> 00:20:38,433 a lot of beautiful and ugly places. 267 00:20:38,466 --> 00:20:40,400 - Right. - Dylan told me later 268 00:20:40,433 --> 00:20:42,300 that he was angry for the condescension 269 00:20:42,333 --> 00:20:44,300 he felt from this person. 270 00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:46,833 He told me how much he resented the judgment 271 00:20:46,866 --> 00:20:50,800 religious people had shown him in his life, 272 00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:53,966 but I was amazed by how comfortable he seemed 273 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,233 in situations like this. 274 00:20:55,266 --> 00:20:57,200 ♪ 275 00:20:57,233 --> 00:20:59,866 - ♪ Holy, holy 276 00:20:59,900 --> 00:21:02,400 ♪ God almighty 277 00:21:04,466 --> 00:21:05,933 - I'm so sorry. 278 00:21:09,166 --> 00:21:10,566 - This is Dylan. 279 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:11,966 - Hi, Dylan, welcome. 280 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,133 God bless you. And who's your friend? 281 00:21:14,166 --> 00:21:15,966 - This is Nanfu. 282 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,866 - Hi. - Hi. Nanfu. 283 00:21:17,900 --> 00:21:19,633 - And what are you doing? Just taking some shots? 284 00:21:19,666 --> 00:21:21,333 - I'm filming. Yeah, him. Yeah. 285 00:21:21,366 --> 00:21:23,433 - Oh, is he a-- - Our journey. 286 00:21:23,466 --> 00:21:24,633 - It's a journey? 287 00:21:24,666 --> 00:21:27,066 Oh, thank you for coming today. Fantastic. 288 00:21:27,100 --> 00:21:30,666 Come on in. Well, look who's back in town. 289 00:21:30,700 --> 00:21:33,500 - They don't want to be filmed, those two. 290 00:21:33,533 --> 00:21:35,966 - In Jesus's name, we come to you, Lord. 291 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,666 Give us thy gifts 292 00:21:37,700 --> 00:21:39,500 - I told you [indistinct]. 293 00:21:39,533 --> 00:21:42,633 - It's just like a cast on us, on our mind, Lord. 294 00:21:42,666 --> 00:21:46,166 Where we want to have that fix that only you can give us. 295 00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:47,800 When we ask for forgiveness 296 00:21:47,833 --> 00:21:49,500 for whatever we've done to somebody, 297 00:21:49,533 --> 00:21:51,133 if we spoke and feel-- 298 00:21:51,166 --> 00:21:53,400 - And for whatever reason you have come on this journey, 299 00:21:53,433 --> 00:21:55,766 Lord God, we just want to pray 300 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,533 your holy spirit will capture his heart 301 00:21:58,566 --> 00:22:02,633 and capture his mind and capture Dylan 302 00:22:02,666 --> 00:22:04,866 and turn him in to the man 303 00:22:04,900 --> 00:22:08,433 that you have designed him to become, Lord. 304 00:22:08,466 --> 00:22:10,300 And he is seeking-- 305 00:22:10,333 --> 00:22:13,000 He's on a quest, Lord Jesus. 306 00:22:13,033 --> 00:22:15,133 I pray that you will just give him the answers 307 00:22:15,166 --> 00:22:17,300 that he's looking for, Lord. 308 00:22:17,333 --> 00:22:19,300 We pray your favor upon Dylan. 309 00:22:19,333 --> 00:22:21,300 We pray that salvation, healing, 310 00:22:21,333 --> 00:22:25,766 and deliverance will come to Dylan's body, soul, and spirit, 311 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:29,100 and to his friend, also Lord, we just pray for her. 312 00:22:29,133 --> 00:22:32,300 We pray that as they travel together that, Lord, 313 00:22:32,333 --> 00:22:35,100 you will put a hedge of protection around them 314 00:22:35,133 --> 00:22:36,866 and that, Lord, your spirit 315 00:22:36,900 --> 00:22:38,666 will fall upon them like it did 316 00:22:38,700 --> 00:22:42,033 when you fell upon Saul, oh, God. 317 00:22:42,066 --> 00:22:45,233 And we just bleed your blood, Jesus, over their lives, 318 00:22:45,266 --> 00:22:47,233 over their hearts and their minds 319 00:22:47,266 --> 00:22:49,300 and their emotions, Lord, and we say, 320 00:22:49,333 --> 00:22:51,633 "Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity 321 00:22:51,666 --> 00:22:54,800 to pray and bless them in Jesus's name." 322 00:22:58,166 --> 00:23:02,066 - I typically never make a sign, 323 00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:05,733 but I figured why not. 324 00:23:05,766 --> 00:23:08,033 A simple sign manifested 325 00:23:08,066 --> 00:23:10,566 into encountering this man, George. 326 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:12,200 - How do you like the United States? 327 00:23:12,233 --> 00:23:13,800 You like it? - Yeah. 328 00:23:13,833 --> 00:23:16,466 - He offered me the $50 bonus 329 00:23:16,500 --> 00:23:20,433 to tour a luxury timeshare in North Beach in Miami. 330 00:23:20,466 --> 00:23:22,800 - Guys, I need you to come over here 331 00:23:22,833 --> 00:23:24,933 for a minute and just initial this. 332 00:23:24,966 --> 00:23:26,700 - It required a bit of paperwork 333 00:23:26,733 --> 00:23:31,066 and fibbing as far as my occupation and salary. 334 00:23:31,100 --> 00:23:32,333 So what? 335 00:23:32,366 --> 00:23:34,966 I could use $50 to help myself 336 00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:36,533 and to help this man 337 00:23:36,566 --> 00:23:39,333 make a few dollars off of referring me. 338 00:23:39,366 --> 00:23:41,833 - Hey, you got to wash your hands, all right? 339 00:23:41,866 --> 00:23:43,333 Come on, let me take you to the bathroom. 340 00:23:43,366 --> 00:23:44,533 Here's your ID. 341 00:23:58,900 --> 00:24:00,600 Okay? 342 00:24:00,633 --> 00:24:03,633 You've gotta finish the tour in order to get the gift. 343 00:24:03,666 --> 00:24:05,966 So in an hour, hour and a half, 344 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,666 they're gonna have snacks up there. 345 00:24:08,700 --> 00:24:10,666 They're gonna tell you about a vacation club, 346 00:24:10,700 --> 00:24:12,233 and, you know, if you like it, buy it. 347 00:24:12,266 --> 00:24:14,766 If you don't--if you don't make spur-of-the-moment decisions, 348 00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:17,100 whatever it is that you do or don't do, it's up to you. 349 00:24:17,133 --> 00:24:20,600 You don't have to buy anything for the gift, okay? 350 00:24:20,633 --> 00:24:23,400 Thank you again. I'll be here when you get done, okay? 351 00:24:23,433 --> 00:24:25,966 I'll be here waiting to pay you. Okay. 352 00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:31,100 - Maybe about a 25-minute van ride, 353 00:24:31,133 --> 00:24:34,400 and you end up at this beautiful facility. 354 00:24:34,433 --> 00:24:38,333 Sure, I'll pretend to be a hotshot wealthy young guy 355 00:24:38,366 --> 00:24:40,400 covered in dirt, stinky. 356 00:24:47,033 --> 00:24:48,100 - Okay. 357 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:55,200 76? 358 00:24:55,233 --> 00:24:57,300 - The pool area's generally [indistinct]. 359 00:25:02,133 --> 00:25:04,900 Brothers? Sisters? 360 00:25:04,933 --> 00:25:08,100 Younger sister, okay. 361 00:25:08,133 --> 00:25:10,333 - Yeah. 362 00:25:10,366 --> 00:25:12,166 - Yeah. 363 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:14,766 The pressure that the older ones always get. 364 00:25:17,366 --> 00:25:19,133 - Yeah. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 365 00:25:19,166 --> 00:25:21,900 Did you guys-- 366 00:25:21,933 --> 00:25:23,400 Okay, cool, cool, cool. 367 00:25:23,433 --> 00:25:25,766 - I told her I was a master carpenter. 368 00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:27,500 That was my way of explaining 369 00:25:27,533 --> 00:25:31,100 my hands being all dirty and stained. 370 00:25:31,133 --> 00:25:34,533 - Right on, brother. 371 00:25:34,566 --> 00:25:36,633 - Yeah? 372 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,066 Yes? 373 00:25:42,100 --> 00:25:45,933 Oh, that's good. - Yeah. 374 00:25:45,966 --> 00:25:48,100 - Mm-hmm. 375 00:25:58,233 --> 00:26:02,600 - The $50 Dylan earned could last for a few days, 376 00:26:02,633 --> 00:26:06,033 maybe beyond the few days I had with him on the streets, 377 00:26:06,066 --> 00:26:09,800 but he decided to go to a restaurant for dinner, 378 00:26:09,833 --> 00:26:13,466 and the rest of the money he gave away. 379 00:26:13,500 --> 00:26:16,400 After a few minutes, not surprisingly 380 00:26:16,433 --> 00:26:18,766 Dylan became friends with the people 381 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:20,466 sitting at the next table. 382 00:26:21,933 --> 00:26:23,500 - What's your name? - I'm Dylan. 383 00:26:23,533 --> 00:26:24,900 - Dylan? - Yes. 384 00:26:24,933 --> 00:26:26,866 - Nice to meet you. Ingrid. - Ingrid? 385 00:26:26,900 --> 00:26:27,966 - Ingrid, yeah. 386 00:26:31,666 --> 00:26:34,266 - That's my grandma. - That's your grandma? 387 00:26:34,300 --> 00:26:36,200 Aww. Bless you. 388 00:26:36,233 --> 00:26:38,300 - This is my mom-- 389 00:26:45,733 --> 00:26:48,166 - Nice to meet you all. 390 00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:51,833 - They gave Dylan $20 and their contact information. 391 00:26:54,500 --> 00:26:56,633 - Yeah, keep in touch with us. - I promise. I promise. 392 00:26:56,666 --> 00:26:58,966 - Yes, and then when we come back here-- 393 00:27:03,300 --> 00:27:05,800 - God forbid, I hope not, but if-- 394 00:27:05,833 --> 00:27:08,200 - Yes. 395 00:27:08,233 --> 00:27:12,333 - All right. All right. 396 00:27:12,366 --> 00:27:14,066 I love it. Love it. 397 00:27:14,100 --> 00:27:15,533 - Absolutely. 398 00:27:15,566 --> 00:27:17,300 - You guys have a beautiful night. 399 00:27:17,333 --> 00:27:18,733 - Thank you. You too. 400 00:27:18,766 --> 00:27:21,166 Bye. 401 00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:31,266 ♪ 402 00:28:07,700 --> 00:28:09,766 - We're sorry. Forgive us. 403 00:28:16,133 --> 00:28:19,300 - I was worried that we would be kicked out of this park. 404 00:28:19,333 --> 00:28:25,033 Sure enough, I got woken up by police. 405 00:28:27,166 --> 00:28:29,233 such things. 406 00:28:50,500 --> 00:28:57,566 ♪ 407 00:29:58,100 --> 00:30:00,166 - This won't? 408 00:30:10,733 --> 00:30:12,500 Before we headed north, 409 00:30:12,533 --> 00:30:18,133 I went to a bathroom in a bagel shop to clean myself. 410 00:30:18,166 --> 00:30:20,566 It took me so long in the bathroom 411 00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:24,300 that the staff noticed and questioned me. 412 00:30:24,333 --> 00:30:28,033 I told them about Dylan and that I was filming him. 413 00:30:28,066 --> 00:30:33,233 Dylan, they were preparing bagels for us on the roads. 414 00:30:33,266 --> 00:30:36,433 Do you want to come in and say thank you to them? 415 00:30:36,466 --> 00:30:38,433 - I don't know why he's in that situation, 416 00:30:38,466 --> 00:30:41,766 but whatever reason, he's there, so why not help? 417 00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,733 - How much money did you give him? 418 00:30:43,766 --> 00:30:45,533 - Just five, five bucks. 419 00:30:45,566 --> 00:30:47,600 Then, like, a half a pack of smokes. 420 00:30:47,633 --> 00:30:49,300 Then we gave him some bagels and stuff. 421 00:30:49,333 --> 00:30:51,600 That was the boss's idea there. 422 00:30:51,633 --> 00:30:54,866 You know, just some bagels and some cream cheese. 423 00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:57,433 Heard he was living on the streets and hungry, 424 00:30:57,466 --> 00:31:01,733 so, you know, why not help someone? 425 00:31:01,766 --> 00:31:03,900 - Soon after we were back on the road, 426 00:31:03,933 --> 00:31:06,700 Dylan decided to sell the bagels. 427 00:31:06,733 --> 00:31:08,266 No one wanted a bagel, 428 00:31:08,300 --> 00:31:12,666 but many people gave him money. 429 00:31:12,700 --> 00:31:14,500 What did you tell him? 430 00:31:14,533 --> 00:31:17,533 - I said, "Yo, you need a bagel for a dollar? 431 00:31:17,566 --> 00:31:18,900 I'm trying to hit this bus." 432 00:31:18,933 --> 00:31:21,200 And he's like, "Hold on. Hold on," 433 00:31:21,233 --> 00:31:22,833 and he went inside and bought some beer 434 00:31:22,866 --> 00:31:25,600 and came back with a dollar, 435 00:31:25,633 --> 00:31:30,133 but he didn't ask for a bagel. 436 00:31:30,166 --> 00:31:31,966 - I was annoyed that Dylan wanted 437 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:34,100 to get rid of the bagels. 438 00:31:34,133 --> 00:31:35,800 I felt that he was ungrateful 439 00:31:35,833 --> 00:31:38,433 for the kindness people showed him. 440 00:31:38,466 --> 00:31:41,600 I felt so disgusted that I lost interest in filming 441 00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:45,066 and gave him the camera. 442 00:31:45,100 --> 00:31:46,866 When I first met Dylan, 443 00:31:46,900 --> 00:31:49,533 he seemed like a symbol for the free America 444 00:31:49,566 --> 00:31:52,300 I had always heard about. 445 00:31:52,333 --> 00:31:53,900 But the longer I spent 446 00:31:53,933 --> 00:31:56,000 observing how he used his freedom, 447 00:31:56,033 --> 00:31:58,100 my feelings changed. 448 00:32:00,900 --> 00:32:02,966 - Spare a dollar? 449 00:32:27,300 --> 00:32:29,133 - I don't eat that much food. 450 00:32:29,166 --> 00:32:31,700 I don't want to carry that around for so long. 451 00:32:31,733 --> 00:32:35,400 I don't want to have to take three [bleep] a day. 452 00:32:35,433 --> 00:32:38,933 I'm not going to get any money from anybody for food 453 00:32:38,966 --> 00:32:43,233 if I'm carrying a big bag of bagels around. 454 00:32:43,266 --> 00:32:46,133 My objective is drinking right now, 455 00:32:46,166 --> 00:32:50,433 and now I have to beg again, which I never beg. 456 00:32:50,466 --> 00:32:53,366 I have to beg today to get some beer. 457 00:32:58,166 --> 00:33:02,233 So I can think straight enough to know what's bothering me. 458 00:33:04,766 --> 00:33:06,466 - But you already knew the answer. 459 00:33:06,500 --> 00:33:09,633 You already knew it, right? 460 00:33:09,666 --> 00:33:12,066 - I need to drink and think about it. 461 00:33:15,900 --> 00:33:18,300 It doesn't involve you, 462 00:33:18,333 --> 00:33:22,966 but I just still need to think about it. 463 00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:24,733 - When he threw away the bagels, 464 00:33:24,766 --> 00:33:27,266 I couldn't stand it. 465 00:33:27,300 --> 00:33:29,533 We had an argument. 466 00:33:29,566 --> 00:33:31,666 I criticized him for taking advantage 467 00:33:31,700 --> 00:33:34,200 of people's kindness. 468 00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,366 But then I thought to myself, 469 00:33:39,400 --> 00:33:43,200 "Was I the one who was taking advantage of him by filming?" 470 00:33:45,266 --> 00:33:50,033 Shortly after this, my trip with Dylan ended. 471 00:33:50,066 --> 00:33:51,833 Dylan stayed on the streets, 472 00:33:51,866 --> 00:33:53,700 and I went back to my life in New York. 473 00:33:53,733 --> 00:33:55,700 [car horn blares] 474 00:33:55,733 --> 00:33:57,666 [traffic noises, whistles blow] 475 00:34:03,466 --> 00:34:06,733 Everything looked different after the trip. 476 00:34:14,433 --> 00:34:16,733 My few weeks on the streets showed me 477 00:34:16,766 --> 00:34:22,300 that my everyday worries from before all seemed pointless. 478 00:34:22,333 --> 00:34:26,966 I knew that whatever happened, I could survive. 479 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:29,500 I soon became busy making a film 480 00:34:29,533 --> 00:34:31,766 about Chinese human rights. 481 00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:37,266 The survival skills I learned on the streets with Dylan 482 00:34:37,300 --> 00:34:40,733 became useful as I was on the run across China 483 00:34:40,766 --> 00:34:42,966 chased by the police. 484 00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,966 I often found myself comparing my experience 485 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:47,866 filming in both countries. 486 00:34:47,900 --> 00:34:50,400 I felt safer sleeping on the streets 487 00:34:50,433 --> 00:34:54,699 than I did traveling in China on buses and trains. 488 00:34:54,733 --> 00:34:57,433 Two years quickly went by. 489 00:34:57,466 --> 00:35:00,433 I often wondered what would happen to Dylan 490 00:35:00,466 --> 00:35:03,166 and if I would see him again. 491 00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:13,266 ♪ 492 00:35:35,566 --> 00:35:39,266 - I started doing these around 2013. 493 00:35:39,300 --> 00:35:42,833 What I would do is in between calls or, you know, 494 00:35:42,866 --> 00:35:45,533 when I was on call and driving around in my work truck, 495 00:35:45,566 --> 00:35:48,400 I would just stick the GoPro to one of the windows 496 00:35:48,433 --> 00:35:51,800 and just say what was on my mind. 497 00:35:51,833 --> 00:35:56,233 It is a beautiful day. 498 00:35:56,266 --> 00:35:59,266 You've got to enjoy those every chance you get. 499 00:36:26,833 --> 00:36:31,300 I am headed off to do some scouting 500 00:36:31,333 --> 00:36:33,466 on a target house... 501 00:36:36,466 --> 00:36:39,266 a little bit. 502 00:36:39,300 --> 00:36:45,200 And then I got to pick up some new handcuffs 503 00:36:45,233 --> 00:36:49,233 because mine... 504 00:36:49,266 --> 00:36:53,700 got stuck on the last guy I arrested, 505 00:36:53,733 --> 00:36:56,466 and that's really upsetting because I've had that pair 506 00:36:56,500 --> 00:36:58,633 of handcuffs for 24 years, 507 00:36:58,666 --> 00:37:01,400 my entire career. 508 00:37:04,433 --> 00:37:05,833 ♪ 509 00:37:08,366 --> 00:37:10,533 - Two years after I first met Dylan, 510 00:37:10,566 --> 00:37:13,166 I traveled to Utah for the first time 511 00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:17,066 for the Chinese human rights film I was working on. 512 00:37:17,100 --> 00:37:19,633 I remembered that Dylan was from Utah, 513 00:37:19,666 --> 00:37:21,300 and I was curious to see 514 00:37:21,333 --> 00:37:24,466 if I could learn more about where he came from. 515 00:37:37,300 --> 00:37:41,933 - I have lots of disks 516 00:37:41,966 --> 00:37:44,833 where I've recorded my thoughts, 517 00:37:44,866 --> 00:37:47,766 just like a video journal, 518 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:52,833 and there's a lot of things that are-- 519 00:37:52,866 --> 00:37:56,200 are special to me, 520 00:37:56,233 --> 00:38:00,800 you know, that I'm glad I have documented. 521 00:38:00,833 --> 00:38:02,966 We got an [indistinct] search warrant, 522 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:05,066 Park City, Utah. 523 00:38:12,766 --> 00:38:15,933 - Police! Search warrant! 524 00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:26,566 - Get on the floor! - Police! Search warrant! 525 00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:28,266 Police! Search warrant! 526 00:38:28,300 --> 00:38:31,733 - I've been a detective since 2011. 527 00:38:31,766 --> 00:38:34,733 I investigate sex crimes. 528 00:38:34,766 --> 00:38:37,300 I'm also assigned to investigate Internet crimes 529 00:38:37,333 --> 00:38:38,633 against children. 530 00:38:38,666 --> 00:38:41,133 We'll execute a search warrant. 531 00:38:41,166 --> 00:38:43,266 High 90% of the time, 532 00:38:43,300 --> 00:38:45,933 we find evidence of child pornography. 533 00:38:45,966 --> 00:38:48,266 Well, the first several times 534 00:38:48,300 --> 00:38:51,500 I had to review material, because I can't say, 535 00:38:51,533 --> 00:38:54,800 "Well...I think this is child porn." 536 00:38:54,833 --> 00:38:57,266 I have to review it and make sure what it is, 537 00:38:57,300 --> 00:38:59,233 and I have to be able to describe 538 00:38:59,266 --> 00:39:02,033 a number of images in videos. 539 00:39:02,066 --> 00:39:05,300 So the first time I did have to do those reviews, 540 00:39:05,333 --> 00:39:09,166 I got some vicarious trauma, and I don't cry hardly ever. 541 00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:11,366 I sat down at my desk one day 542 00:39:11,400 --> 00:39:15,766 and just kind of started to cry. 543 00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:19,666 This was a way to get those things off my chest 544 00:39:19,700 --> 00:39:21,533 even though I'm only talking to myself. 545 00:39:21,566 --> 00:39:25,466 I couldn't talk to other people about it. 546 00:39:25,500 --> 00:39:27,966 Every once in a while I'd wake up really early, 547 00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:29,833 and I just couldn't go back to bed, 548 00:39:29,866 --> 00:39:32,733 so I decided just to go to work. 549 00:39:32,766 --> 00:39:36,266 I started the camera from my driveway, 550 00:39:36,300 --> 00:39:38,833 and it was super dark, so you can't see anything, 551 00:39:38,866 --> 00:39:41,433 but you could hear what I was talking about. 552 00:39:41,466 --> 00:39:43,766 I have three kids. 553 00:39:46,533 --> 00:39:49,200 My youngest is 15. 554 00:39:49,233 --> 00:39:54,133 He gets straight A's in school, very smart. 555 00:39:54,166 --> 00:39:58,866 My daughter is... 556 00:39:58,900 --> 00:40:01,233 Working on graduating from college. 557 00:40:01,266 --> 00:40:04,566 She's so kindhearted and good. 558 00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:08,933 And my oldest boy, he's 23. 559 00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:16,033 He's been a transient all around the country. 560 00:40:16,066 --> 00:40:21,100 ♪ 561 00:40:26,366 --> 00:40:31,266 No parent wants their child to be homeless on the street. 562 00:40:31,300 --> 00:40:33,533 I think when you're a parent, 563 00:40:33,566 --> 00:40:35,766 you want your children to be kind of like you. 564 00:40:35,800 --> 00:40:40,800 He looks just like I did when I was his age or younger. 565 00:40:40,833 --> 00:40:43,366 We have a lot of similarities in our voice 566 00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:48,333 and the way that we really care about people. 567 00:40:48,366 --> 00:40:50,666 All three of my children grew up 568 00:40:50,700 --> 00:40:54,333 with the same expectations and the same knowledge, 569 00:40:54,366 --> 00:40:57,300 and they all turned out so very differently. 570 00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:04,933 ♪ 571 00:41:07,366 --> 00:41:12,133 - I'm kind of a religious person. 572 00:41:12,166 --> 00:41:14,900 Well, I'm actually a very religious person, but-- 573 00:41:14,933 --> 00:41:16,833 ♪ 574 00:41:16,866 --> 00:41:18,733 I wouldn't dream of breaking the rules, 575 00:41:18,766 --> 00:41:23,600 but Dylan is all out there happily breaking all the rules 576 00:41:23,633 --> 00:41:25,766 that he can get away with, you know? 577 00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,833 I feel like he has this sense of freedom 578 00:41:28,866 --> 00:41:30,500 with breaking rules, you know? 579 00:41:30,533 --> 00:41:33,666 I don't think he likes to be bound by anything, 580 00:41:33,700 --> 00:41:37,500 or I don't think he likes to be told what to do. 581 00:41:37,533 --> 00:41:39,133 The way I see homeless people 582 00:41:39,166 --> 00:41:41,000 is people who made bad decisions, 583 00:41:41,033 --> 00:41:42,966 you know, and I'm sure if they could go back, 584 00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:47,600 they'd change those bad decisions. 585 00:41:47,633 --> 00:41:52,800 - The way Ashton feels was 100% totally his choice. 586 00:41:52,833 --> 00:41:55,066 He can do whatever he wants. 587 00:41:55,100 --> 00:41:57,700 Dylan, the same way. 588 00:41:57,733 --> 00:42:00,833 He has the freedom to choose. 589 00:42:07,433 --> 00:42:11,466 - I learned that Dylan has a very loving family. 590 00:42:11,500 --> 00:42:16,800 I wondered what made him choose to live on the streets. 591 00:42:16,833 --> 00:42:19,166 - Part of it was he hated Utah. 592 00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:21,066 He hated the local religion, 593 00:42:21,100 --> 00:42:23,833 and so he had made some friends, 594 00:42:23,866 --> 00:42:26,300 and they had different philosophies. 595 00:42:26,333 --> 00:42:29,066 There was drug use in those circles. 596 00:42:29,100 --> 00:42:32,366 His drug habit got more and more intense, 597 00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:34,733 and he'd had some psychological problems 598 00:42:34,766 --> 00:42:36,833 that we tried to deal with. 599 00:42:36,866 --> 00:42:39,166 He gets his medications. 600 00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:42,033 Then he'll go out and sell it for $300, 601 00:42:42,066 --> 00:42:44,566 so there was a lot of frustrations. 602 00:42:44,600 --> 00:42:47,266 You know, what can we do to help? 603 00:42:47,300 --> 00:42:49,666 When you have a child you want to help, 604 00:42:49,700 --> 00:42:52,100 you've got to simplify the rules, you know, 605 00:42:52,133 --> 00:42:54,033 and I had simple rules. 606 00:42:54,066 --> 00:42:57,433 Don't bring drugs into my house, 607 00:42:57,466 --> 00:43:01,333 and I made him come up with the consequence. 608 00:43:01,366 --> 00:43:03,300 "All right, so if you violate these rules, 609 00:43:03,333 --> 00:43:04,600 what's the consequences?" 610 00:43:04,633 --> 00:43:07,066 He came up with it. He said, "I'm out." 611 00:43:07,100 --> 00:43:10,366 And so, you know, there was a time 612 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:13,433 when I found some things in his room here. 613 00:43:13,466 --> 00:43:15,733 I just-- 614 00:43:15,766 --> 00:43:18,633 And I pointed it out to him, 615 00:43:18,666 --> 00:43:21,633 and I says, "Well, what's gonna happen now?" 616 00:43:21,666 --> 00:43:24,733 He says, "Dad, I know. I got to go." 617 00:43:24,766 --> 00:43:27,400 He told me, "Just drop me off in the mountains." 618 00:43:27,433 --> 00:43:28,966 We're driving up on 89. 619 00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:30,500 "Just drop me off in the mountains." 620 00:43:30,533 --> 00:43:33,633 I said, "I can't drop you off in the mountains." 621 00:43:33,666 --> 00:43:37,766 I said, "It's getting cold, and you'll die of exposure," 622 00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:40,833 so I bought him 623 00:43:40,866 --> 00:43:44,533 a bus ticket to San Diego, 624 00:43:44,566 --> 00:43:48,266 and I looked up every social service program 625 00:43:48,300 --> 00:43:52,533 that could help him that was in the San Diego area. 626 00:43:52,566 --> 00:43:54,800 I printed those up with maps. 627 00:43:54,833 --> 00:43:58,000 I had his whole itinerary of being homeless planned. 628 00:43:58,033 --> 00:43:59,866 "Here's where the bus station is. 629 00:43:59,900 --> 00:44:02,400 "Here's where you can get some food. 630 00:44:02,433 --> 00:44:05,566 Here's where someone can help you to get a job." 631 00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:09,100 He was excited to go in a way, 632 00:44:09,133 --> 00:44:11,766 and I'm frightened. 633 00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:14,700 I'm terrified at this point. 634 00:44:14,733 --> 00:44:18,900 So... 635 00:44:18,933 --> 00:44:20,166 at the end of the day, 636 00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:22,766 I took him down to the Greyhound station, 637 00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:25,500 and I had that $400 in my pocket, 638 00:44:25,533 --> 00:44:27,300 and I thought to myself, 639 00:44:27,333 --> 00:44:31,066 "If I just give him $400 here and we part ways, 640 00:44:31,100 --> 00:44:34,700 he'll be in downtown Salt Lake buying drugs." 641 00:44:34,733 --> 00:44:38,500 So I waited until he was in line for the Greyhound bus. 642 00:44:59,933 --> 00:45:04,433 Then I gave him $400. 643 00:45:04,466 --> 00:45:07,966 And I said, "Don't lose it." 644 00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:11,866 "Don't lose any of this stuff. 645 00:45:11,900 --> 00:45:16,133 "I want you to survive, and I trust-- 646 00:45:16,166 --> 00:45:19,233 I trust you. I trust that you can survive." 647 00:45:34,733 --> 00:45:39,466 And I watched the bus go away, 648 00:45:39,500 --> 00:45:41,933 and I call that one of the three 649 00:45:41,966 --> 00:45:44,366 saddest days of my life. 650 00:46:03,433 --> 00:46:07,033 One of them being when Brenton died. 651 00:46:10,566 --> 00:46:14,300 Our first son passed away at birth, 652 00:46:14,333 --> 00:46:15,466 and that was tough. 653 00:46:15,500 --> 00:46:20,033 I remember going out to the cemetery 654 00:46:20,066 --> 00:46:22,566 and just crying 655 00:46:22,600 --> 00:46:24,866 and bathed his headstone in my tears. 656 00:46:24,900 --> 00:46:27,466 I couldn't believe all the bad things 657 00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:29,966 that have happened to me in my life. 658 00:46:33,733 --> 00:46:37,266 One of them being when the woman 659 00:46:37,300 --> 00:46:40,066 I was married to for 18 years 660 00:46:40,100 --> 00:46:44,366 said she didn't want to be married to me anymore. 661 00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:48,166 I think the divorce was really hard for Dylan. 662 00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:55,266 ♪ 663 00:47:01,433 --> 00:47:03,766 - I think it might have had effects on Dylan, 664 00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:07,300 but his behavior had more effects on us. 665 00:47:07,333 --> 00:47:10,166 For me, I kind of had a breakdown 666 00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:11,866 'cause I didn't know what to do with him. 667 00:47:11,900 --> 00:47:13,800 John didn't know what to do with him, 668 00:47:13,833 --> 00:47:17,266 and I think it strained our relationship. 669 00:47:17,300 --> 00:47:20,466 - Dylan's mother agreed to one interview with me, 670 00:47:20,500 --> 00:47:22,533 but she didn't want to participate further 671 00:47:22,566 --> 00:47:25,900 in the film because reliving these memories 672 00:47:25,933 --> 00:47:27,966 was very painful for her. 673 00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:30,133 - There's a lot of moms that have homeless children 674 00:47:30,166 --> 00:47:33,233 that are addicts, and you never sleep at night. 675 00:47:33,266 --> 00:47:35,200 You always worry about them. 676 00:47:35,233 --> 00:47:38,300 As any mom with an addicted child will tell you, 677 00:47:38,333 --> 00:47:40,166 that every time the phone rings, 678 00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:42,166 you wonder if that's the call. 679 00:47:42,200 --> 00:47:45,166 Every time there's a number that you don't recognize, 680 00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:47,266 you--your heart drops 681 00:47:47,300 --> 00:47:50,733 because you know that some day there's a real possibility 682 00:47:50,766 --> 00:47:53,133 that you're gonna get that call, 683 00:47:53,166 --> 00:47:55,400 and that's... 684 00:47:55,433 --> 00:47:57,733 something that I worry about all the time. 685 00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:08,200 - She was always convinced that he was murdered somewhere, 686 00:48:08,233 --> 00:48:11,333 and I would say to myself, 687 00:48:11,366 --> 00:48:15,133 "No, no, if something that bad happened, somebody would--" 688 00:48:15,166 --> 00:48:17,600 I know how law enforcement works. 689 00:48:17,633 --> 00:48:19,466 They would've figured out who he was, 690 00:48:19,500 --> 00:48:20,833 and I would have got a phone call. 691 00:48:20,866 --> 00:48:24,400 So no news is good news, but it was a long time, 692 00:48:24,433 --> 00:48:29,266 and I was just terrified, worrying like, 693 00:48:29,300 --> 00:48:31,133 "Oh, my gosh, what did I do?" 694 00:48:31,166 --> 00:48:32,666 You know, I just like, 695 00:48:32,700 --> 00:48:37,166 "Is he okay? What's wrong?" 696 00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:40,900 Until the first time he called me. 697 00:48:40,933 --> 00:48:44,333 Oh, man, I was so glad to hear his voice, 698 00:48:44,366 --> 00:48:47,433 and he said, "Guess where I'm at." 699 00:48:47,466 --> 00:48:51,466 He said he was on somebody's boat, 700 00:48:51,500 --> 00:48:56,633 and they'd hired him to help them work on the guy's boat 701 00:48:56,666 --> 00:48:58,266 and was paying him money, 702 00:48:58,300 --> 00:49:01,333 and I thought, "Oh, my gosh, hallelujah." 703 00:49:01,366 --> 00:49:03,933 Okay, so now he's in a place that he likes, 704 00:49:03,966 --> 00:49:07,000 and he has something positive, you know, 705 00:49:07,033 --> 00:49:09,200 and that's the first time I learned 706 00:49:09,233 --> 00:49:12,033 "This is where Dylan just started being Dylan." 707 00:49:15,066 --> 00:49:22,033 ♪ 708 00:49:22,066 --> 00:49:26,433 A few weeks later he calls me. "Guess where I'm at." 709 00:49:26,466 --> 00:49:27,700 "Where?" 710 00:49:27,733 --> 00:49:31,300 "At a mansion in Malibu 711 00:49:31,333 --> 00:49:34,900 drinking a glass of wine looking at the ocean." 712 00:49:34,933 --> 00:49:38,800 And he sends me a text picture of him-- 713 00:49:38,833 --> 00:49:42,100 of a glass of wine, and there's the ocean. 714 00:49:42,133 --> 00:49:43,866 He's up on the hill in Malibu. 715 00:49:43,900 --> 00:49:48,000 "Oh, my gosh. Hallelujah. What the heck." 716 00:49:48,033 --> 00:49:50,566 San Diego, Panama City, Florida, 717 00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:52,566 New York, and all kinds of places. 718 00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:54,700 Heck, he got on a sailboat 719 00:49:54,733 --> 00:49:58,966 and was 80 miles off the shore in blue water. 720 00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:02,500 I'm thinking, this kid is living kind of a Forrest Gump, 721 00:50:02,533 --> 00:50:04,733 Walter Mitty kind of existence, 722 00:50:04,766 --> 00:50:08,566 and--and, uh... 723 00:50:08,600 --> 00:50:13,566 I started to talk to my friends about it. 724 00:50:13,600 --> 00:50:17,200 I'm proud of Dylan in so many respects, 725 00:50:17,233 --> 00:50:20,100 you know, and so interested, 726 00:50:20,133 --> 00:50:22,800 but on the other side, 727 00:50:22,833 --> 00:50:25,266 what's he gonna do when he gets old? 728 00:50:28,300 --> 00:50:31,533 I think to myself, "What are you doing, kid?" 729 00:50:31,566 --> 00:50:34,133 I'm confused, and I don't understand, 730 00:50:34,166 --> 00:50:38,333 and I hope he's happy. 731 00:50:40,333 --> 00:50:45,266 I hope he is always up for another adventure, 732 00:50:45,300 --> 00:50:48,400 but I hope he's a healthy guy. 733 00:50:48,433 --> 00:50:53,300 I hope he can find the balance there 734 00:50:53,333 --> 00:50:56,900 'cause I don't want him to die before I do. 735 00:51:02,466 --> 00:51:05,633 - Several months after my first trip to Utah, 736 00:51:05,666 --> 00:51:07,733 John was getting remarried, 737 00:51:07,766 --> 00:51:09,700 and he invited me to the wedding, 738 00:51:09,733 --> 00:51:11,933 especially since Dylan would be there. 739 00:51:11,966 --> 00:51:15,800 It would be the first time any of us had seen Dylan in years. 740 00:51:15,833 --> 00:51:22,900 ♪ 741 00:51:42,466 --> 00:51:49,533 ♪ 742 00:52:00,200 --> 00:52:02,333 - First, I would like to welcome everybody 743 00:52:02,366 --> 00:52:05,100 for coming out today. 744 00:52:05,133 --> 00:52:07,233 I could go on all day 745 00:52:07,266 --> 00:52:09,900 talking about how wonderful my family is 746 00:52:09,933 --> 00:52:12,366 and just love them, and my job makes me grateful 747 00:52:12,400 --> 00:52:14,566 even more for my family every day, 748 00:52:14,600 --> 00:52:16,933 but I'm gonna focus a little bit of attention 749 00:52:16,966 --> 00:52:18,566 on my children. 750 00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:21,366 Dylan here. Raise your hand, Dylan. 751 00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:24,166 He's my oldest son. 752 00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:26,866 Dylan is super intelligent. 753 00:52:26,900 --> 00:52:29,200 He is, like, one of the most awesome adventurers 754 00:52:29,233 --> 00:52:32,133 I've ever known, very resourceful, 755 00:52:32,166 --> 00:52:34,166 and one thing about Dylan 756 00:52:34,200 --> 00:52:37,566 is he knows how to write 757 00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:39,233 and express himself. 758 00:52:39,266 --> 00:52:42,133 Like, I read some of the things that this kid wrote, 759 00:52:42,166 --> 00:52:44,066 and I just want him to put it in a book. 760 00:52:44,100 --> 00:52:47,066 Kayla, she is the sweetest, 761 00:52:47,100 --> 00:52:51,400 most kindest person in the world totally. 762 00:52:51,433 --> 00:52:53,566 I love you very much. 763 00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:57,533 Well, without further ado, I'll have Ashton play a song, 764 00:52:57,566 --> 00:52:59,233 and in the middle of the song 765 00:52:59,266 --> 00:53:03,100 is when we'll introduce my beautiful bride to you guys. 766 00:53:06,866 --> 00:53:09,633 - By virtue of the legal authority invested in me 767 00:53:09,666 --> 00:53:12,633 as elder of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, 768 00:53:12,666 --> 00:53:16,800 I pronounce you, John Corbin Olsen 769 00:53:16,833 --> 00:53:18,900 and Wende Sue Mabey, 770 00:53:18,933 --> 00:53:23,266 husband and wife, legally and lawfully wedded 771 00:53:23,300 --> 00:53:27,066 for the period of your mortal lives. 772 00:53:27,100 --> 00:53:29,366 May God bless you in this union with joy, 773 00:53:29,400 --> 00:53:32,666 and your posterity in a long life of happiness together, 774 00:53:32,700 --> 00:53:35,900 and may he enable you to keep sacred covenants you've made. 775 00:53:35,933 --> 00:53:37,866 Mr. and Mrs. Olsen. 776 00:53:37,900 --> 00:53:40,000 - Oh, my God. 777 00:53:40,033 --> 00:53:42,000 - Awww! 778 00:53:45,666 --> 00:53:48,733 - The youngest, five. That's fine too. 779 00:53:48,766 --> 00:53:50,100 You're just five. - Hello. 780 00:53:50,133 --> 00:53:53,200 - I'm Grandma. - Yeah. 781 00:53:53,233 --> 00:53:57,300 - I hear all about you, how amazing you are. 782 00:53:57,333 --> 00:54:00,133 - Well, I don't think I'm that amazing. 783 00:54:00,166 --> 00:54:01,933 People are nice, though, to say that. 784 00:54:01,966 --> 00:54:05,633 - I hear you-- How long will you be here? 785 00:54:05,666 --> 00:54:08,466 - I'll probably be here for a few months. 786 00:54:08,500 --> 00:54:11,933 - That's good. - Yeah, I'll be hanging around. 787 00:54:11,966 --> 00:54:14,466 It's good to be around the family. 788 00:54:14,500 --> 00:54:17,200 I've been away for far too long, 789 00:54:17,233 --> 00:54:19,733 and so being around the family is-- 790 00:54:19,766 --> 00:54:21,433 it feels really nice. 791 00:54:21,466 --> 00:54:24,333 - That's good. That's good. 792 00:54:24,366 --> 00:54:27,100 That's good you're going to stay. 793 00:54:27,133 --> 00:54:28,866 - Mm-hmm. 794 00:54:28,900 --> 00:54:32,200 Yeah, I'm excited to stay. 795 00:54:32,233 --> 00:54:35,533 all: ♪ There was this boy whose ♪ 796 00:54:35,566 --> 00:54:37,166 ♪ Parents made him 797 00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:40,266 ♪ Come directly home right after school ♪ 798 00:54:40,300 --> 00:54:42,633 ♪ And when 799 00:54:42,666 --> 00:54:46,066 ♪ They went to their church ♪ 800 00:54:46,100 --> 00:54:48,933 ♪ They shook 801 00:54:48,966 --> 00:54:52,533 ♪ And lurched all over the church floor ♪ 802 00:54:52,566 --> 00:54:54,633 ♪ 803 00:54:54,666 --> 00:54:56,533 ♪ He couldn't quite explain it ♪ 804 00:54:56,566 --> 00:54:58,366 - While Dylan was in Utah, 805 00:54:58,400 --> 00:55:02,133 he took me to some of his memorable places. 806 00:55:02,166 --> 00:55:04,200 - Ever since I was a kid, 807 00:55:04,233 --> 00:55:06,900 I've always been so attracted 808 00:55:06,933 --> 00:55:10,133 to the--to the aesthetic life, 809 00:55:10,166 --> 00:55:14,100 the guy who lives out of a backpack and just travels. 810 00:55:14,133 --> 00:55:18,366 This is a little place we used to hang out. 811 00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:23,066 I ran away from home one time and stayed here for-- 812 00:55:23,100 --> 00:55:26,433 I don't know-- a good couple of days. 813 00:55:26,466 --> 00:55:31,933 Utah, this is a place of geographical wonder. 814 00:55:31,966 --> 00:55:37,033 The high elevation mountain lakes, the deserts, 815 00:55:37,066 --> 00:55:39,000 the red rock, 816 00:55:39,033 --> 00:55:42,300 the mountains, the marshlands, 817 00:55:42,333 --> 00:55:45,866 the lakes, everywhere, this is where I grew up. 818 00:55:45,900 --> 00:55:48,133 This is where I got to explore 819 00:55:48,166 --> 00:55:49,700 and learn how to be a woodsman 820 00:55:49,733 --> 00:55:52,666 and learn how to swim and fish 821 00:55:52,700 --> 00:55:55,266 and explore exploring itself. 822 00:55:57,800 --> 00:56:00,633 Sadly this place is very conservative 823 00:56:00,666 --> 00:56:02,666 and very judgmental, 824 00:56:02,700 --> 00:56:05,400 predominantly populated by people 825 00:56:05,433 --> 00:56:09,733 who want to worship their lord and savior, Jesus. 826 00:56:13,266 --> 00:56:16,133 Somebody like me with tattoos, an open mind, 827 00:56:16,166 --> 00:56:18,633 and--you know, I get shunned out. 828 00:56:18,666 --> 00:56:21,366 You can't get a job. You're judged. 829 00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:23,266 You're scrutinized thoroughly. 830 00:56:23,300 --> 00:56:25,766 You smoke cigarettes, heaven forbid. 831 00:56:25,800 --> 00:56:27,666 You drink a beer, heaven forbid. 832 00:56:27,700 --> 00:56:29,700 I love to come here to visit, 833 00:56:29,733 --> 00:56:32,033 but trying to become part of the inner 834 00:56:32,066 --> 00:56:34,266 social structure of this state, 835 00:56:34,300 --> 00:56:36,966 it's a bit more of a challenge than other places. 836 00:56:37,000 --> 00:56:41,300 A man from the past living in the present 837 00:56:41,333 --> 00:56:43,366 so his presence is living in the future. 838 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:47,366 He only sought the things that the whole world forgot. 839 00:56:47,400 --> 00:56:50,066 I am he. He is me. 840 00:56:50,100 --> 00:56:54,166 If you only knew he is another you. 841 00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:57,300 - That night, Dylan asked me to show his family 842 00:56:57,333 --> 00:57:00,900 the footage I filmed on the streets in Florida. 843 00:57:00,933 --> 00:57:03,433 Dylan was excited to see it. 844 00:57:03,466 --> 00:57:08,400 - Oh, I remember this dude. This cat was weird. 845 00:57:08,433 --> 00:57:09,866 I forgot about him. 846 00:57:09,900 --> 00:57:12,533 That was the bagel store right there. 847 00:57:12,566 --> 00:57:15,900 I love this man. Good dude. 848 00:57:15,933 --> 00:57:19,666 - But gradually I noticed that not everyone was comfortable 849 00:57:19,700 --> 00:57:22,066 seeing Dylan as a homeless person. 850 00:57:22,100 --> 00:57:25,633 - Oh, . 851 00:57:25,666 --> 00:57:29,633 Oh, he's so awesome. 852 00:57:29,666 --> 00:57:32,600 Oh. [bleep] ass [bleep]. 853 00:57:42,100 --> 00:57:43,966 Son of a bitch. 854 00:57:55,100 --> 00:57:57,200 - After the screening, 855 00:57:57,233 --> 00:58:00,966 Ashton told Dylan not to curse in front of him, 856 00:58:01,000 --> 00:58:03,333 which made Dylan very upset. 857 00:58:06,366 --> 00:58:13,433 ♪ 858 00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:18,266 - You're a pain in the ass. You realize that? 859 00:58:18,300 --> 00:58:25,333 ♪ 860 00:58:34,700 --> 00:58:37,066 I just wish that he could see 861 00:58:37,100 --> 00:58:40,133 my side of the world a little bit better. 862 00:58:40,166 --> 00:58:42,633 If one day he wakes up and he's like, 863 00:58:42,666 --> 00:58:46,666 "Wow. the Mormon religion is bull 864 00:58:46,700 --> 00:58:50,166 and my entire [bleep] life philosophy is gone," 865 00:58:50,200 --> 00:58:51,633 just like what happened to me, 866 00:58:51,666 --> 00:58:54,333 if one day he realizes that's gone, 867 00:58:54,366 --> 00:58:56,566 what the [bleep] would he do? 868 00:58:56,600 --> 00:59:03,733 ♪ 869 00:59:07,600 --> 00:59:10,800 - Instead of sleeping in his parents' house, 870 00:59:10,833 --> 00:59:14,833 Dylan went to do drugs with his friends on the mountain. 871 00:59:14,866 --> 00:59:21,933 ♪ 872 00:59:35,166 --> 00:59:38,233 Dylan left Utah soon after the wedding. 873 00:59:38,266 --> 00:59:41,666 It was then I remembered something that John told me 874 00:59:41,700 --> 00:59:44,733 the first time I met him. 875 00:59:44,766 --> 00:59:46,666 - He'd had some psychological problems 876 00:59:46,700 --> 00:59:48,800 that we tried to deal with. 877 00:59:48,833 --> 00:59:51,700 He gets his medications, and then he'll go out 878 00:59:51,733 --> 00:59:54,166 and sell it for $300. 879 00:59:54,200 --> 00:59:56,433 - I ignored what he told me back then. 880 00:59:56,466 --> 00:59:59,066 I dismissed it as an overreaction 881 00:59:59,100 --> 01:00:01,300 to Dylan's nonconformity, 882 01:00:01,333 --> 01:00:05,333 but I realized my own bias kept me from hearing 883 01:00:05,366 --> 01:00:07,566 what John tried to tell me. 884 01:00:07,600 --> 01:00:13,000 - Part of his mental issues was severe paranoia. 885 01:00:13,033 --> 01:00:16,000 He starts to tell me that there's people after him, 886 01:00:16,033 --> 01:00:17,833 and he starts naming names, 887 01:00:17,866 --> 01:00:23,533 and I know these--I knew one of the people was here 888 01:00:23,566 --> 01:00:27,733 and couldn't possibly have even known where he was, 889 01:00:27,766 --> 01:00:31,100 so I tried to tell him, convince him, 890 01:00:31,133 --> 01:00:35,666 that he was just having hallucinations. 891 01:00:35,700 --> 01:00:38,333 - How did you know it wasn't from the drug use? 892 01:00:38,366 --> 01:00:42,333 - Because I've known a lot of drug addicts 893 01:00:42,366 --> 01:00:44,266 in the course of my career, 894 01:00:44,300 --> 01:00:50,466 and people who were blitzed on you name it, 895 01:00:50,500 --> 01:00:55,433 and that's not a typical reaction to the drugs. 896 01:00:55,466 --> 01:01:00,133 I know that the drugs compounded the issue. 897 01:01:00,166 --> 01:01:04,533 - I wonder when Dylan first had that type of experience 898 01:01:04,566 --> 01:01:07,200 and whether he had told you. 899 01:01:09,433 --> 01:01:12,966 - It really didn't come on strong until he was 17, 900 01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:16,766 18 years old. 901 01:01:16,800 --> 01:01:21,933 He's always been open and honest with me 902 01:01:21,966 --> 01:01:24,733 about bad things going on in his life. 903 01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:31,900 But I can't guarantee that he wasn't hiding something 904 01:01:31,933 --> 01:01:34,200 that was bothering him, 905 01:01:34,233 --> 01:01:38,133 or that he would even know that this isn't real, 906 01:01:38,166 --> 01:01:40,000 and this isn't the way it is. 907 01:01:40,033 --> 01:01:42,966 I mean, he could've been experiencing things to this day 908 01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:47,233 that he thinks were real that didn't actually happen. 909 01:01:47,266 --> 01:01:54,333 ♪ 910 01:02:12,100 --> 01:02:13,833 - Every time I close my eyes, 911 01:02:13,866 --> 01:02:16,800 I'm mesmerized by some kind of dream. 912 01:02:31,833 --> 01:02:33,866 Places I've never seen before 913 01:02:33,900 --> 01:02:36,333 but I feel like I've seen before. 914 01:02:39,266 --> 01:02:42,266 The first time that I heard them so vividly, 915 01:02:42,300 --> 01:02:44,866 I just thought I was possessed. 916 01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:51,500 I'd look at somebody, 917 01:02:51,533 --> 01:02:54,233 and I swear I could hear what they were thinking, 918 01:02:54,266 --> 01:02:55,966 and then I'd look at somebody else, 919 01:02:56,000 --> 01:02:58,200 and I would hear what they were thinking. 920 01:03:02,300 --> 01:03:05,300 And I was just afraid. 921 01:03:09,133 --> 01:03:11,533 I don't even remember what happened after that. 922 01:03:11,566 --> 01:03:14,000 I don't even know how I got-- 923 01:03:16,433 --> 01:03:18,733 Yeah, I really can't even remember what happened. 924 01:03:18,766 --> 01:03:20,766 I went blank for, like, a week. 925 01:03:36,566 --> 01:03:38,133 I could put it on the inside so it would be hidden. 926 01:03:38,166 --> 01:03:40,000 - Which inside? - See how it's got this-- 927 01:03:40,033 --> 01:03:43,100 - Where. Oh, cool. - All right. 928 01:03:43,133 --> 01:03:47,866 Go in the shade somewhere? - Mm-hmm. 929 01:03:47,900 --> 01:03:50,600 Here's the thing that I kept wondering 930 01:03:50,633 --> 01:03:52,200 and I couldn't understand, 931 01:03:52,233 --> 01:03:54,933 because we spent almost a month together, 932 01:03:54,966 --> 01:03:58,633 and I did not notice anything, 933 01:03:58,666 --> 01:04:00,833 whether you behaved differently, 934 01:04:00,866 --> 01:04:03,500 whether you were nervous or panicked or anything. 935 01:04:03,533 --> 01:04:07,033 Was it just a bad time period, just, like, nothing happened? 936 01:04:07,066 --> 01:04:08,966 You didn't hear voices? You didn't see illusions? 937 01:04:09,000 --> 01:04:10,866 - No, I just didn't let it show. 938 01:04:10,900 --> 01:04:13,266 - Really? - Yeah. I just hide a lot of it. 939 01:04:13,300 --> 01:04:16,100 - How could you hide if that's so strong? 940 01:04:16,133 --> 01:04:19,900 - Alcohol. - Really? 941 01:04:19,933 --> 01:04:23,100 - Alcohol helps. When I--I mean, for instance, 942 01:04:23,133 --> 01:04:24,966 there was that one time 943 01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:28,466 we were eating the dinner in South Beach. 944 01:04:28,500 --> 01:04:32,066 We were sitting next to that family, 945 01:04:32,100 --> 01:04:34,133 and some guy gave me a weird look, 946 01:04:34,166 --> 01:04:36,200 some, like, gang-banger-looking guy. 947 01:04:36,233 --> 01:04:37,800 He looked at me and he was like, "What's up?" 948 01:04:37,833 --> 01:04:41,466 And it just--immediately I got this panic going on. 949 01:04:41,500 --> 01:04:43,266 I remember the first thing I did is I went 950 01:04:43,300 --> 01:04:44,966 and bought some alcohol, 951 01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:47,366 and we got on that bus, I was drinking the vodka, 952 01:04:47,400 --> 01:04:50,000 and I was all happy on the bus after that. 953 01:04:52,633 --> 01:04:54,333 - I had been with Dylan 954 01:04:54,366 --> 01:04:56,966 that whole night filming everything, 955 01:04:57,000 --> 01:04:58,866 but I missed this, 956 01:04:58,900 --> 01:05:02,533 this entire narrative that was running in his head. 957 01:05:04,333 --> 01:05:06,700 I went back to look at my footage 958 01:05:06,733 --> 01:05:11,666 and finally noticed how much Dylan had been drinking. 959 01:05:11,700 --> 01:05:13,366 It was constant. 960 01:05:16,400 --> 01:05:20,566 ♪ 961 01:05:20,600 --> 01:05:22,066 Are you drunk? 962 01:05:22,100 --> 01:05:24,333 He told me that the voices had always been there. 963 01:05:24,366 --> 01:05:27,466 - It's a sensation that I'm gonna deal with my whole life, 964 01:05:27,500 --> 01:05:30,200 and I'm just--I'm basically in the--I don't know-- 965 01:05:30,233 --> 01:05:31,500 kindergarten stage 966 01:05:31,533 --> 01:05:34,500 of trying to understand this phenomenon 967 01:05:34,533 --> 01:05:37,366 going on in my psyche and my spirituality. 968 01:05:42,766 --> 01:05:44,933 - I'm trying to understand. 969 01:05:44,966 --> 01:05:48,300 - It's--It's-- Yeah, you can't-- 970 01:05:48,333 --> 01:05:50,400 It's something really difficult to explain, 971 01:05:50,433 --> 01:05:53,800 and that's why there's such little compassion towards it. 972 01:05:56,066 --> 01:05:58,100 - I asked Dylan if he remembered 973 01:05:58,133 --> 01:06:00,433 any of the voices he heard. 974 01:06:00,466 --> 01:06:02,733 He said he had written them down. 975 01:06:02,766 --> 01:06:03,866 - And these are true things 976 01:06:03,900 --> 01:06:06,533 that I've actually heard in the past. 977 01:06:06,566 --> 01:06:09,233 "Look at him. He's so foolish. Watch how he's doing it. 978 01:06:09,266 --> 01:06:11,100 "Yep, he hears us. That idiot. 979 01:06:11,133 --> 01:06:13,200 "You're always gonna be someone's bitch, Dylan. 980 01:06:13,233 --> 01:06:15,733 "This is Project Craft unit 27-A. 981 01:06:15,766 --> 01:06:17,266 "Your grandpa's dying right now. 982 01:06:17,300 --> 01:06:19,033 "Listen to him suffering in the hospital. 983 01:06:19,066 --> 01:06:21,366 "And the old man moaning sound and groaning. 984 01:06:21,400 --> 01:06:23,333 He has lasted longer than most..." 985 01:06:24,900 --> 01:06:27,300 "Remember San Diego? That was crazy. 986 01:06:27,333 --> 01:06:29,133 That was so [bleep]." 987 01:06:30,366 --> 01:06:31,933 "He's terrified of everything. 988 01:06:31,966 --> 01:06:33,566 Yeah, PTSD." 989 01:06:47,566 --> 01:06:50,966 - When I was a child in China, people in my village 990 01:06:51,000 --> 01:06:54,833 used to say that mental illness was contagious. 991 01:06:54,866 --> 01:06:57,533 When I grew up, the media said 992 01:06:57,566 --> 01:06:59,033 that people who protested 993 01:06:59,066 --> 01:07:01,833 against the government had mental illness, 994 01:07:01,866 --> 01:07:03,633 and I had seen how dissidents 995 01:07:03,666 --> 01:07:05,766 were locked in mental hospitals. 996 01:07:09,333 --> 01:07:12,633 When John first told me that Dylan was mentally ill, 997 01:07:12,666 --> 01:07:14,833 I was in denial. 998 01:07:14,866 --> 01:07:18,900 But now, hearing Dylan describing his mental trauma, 999 01:07:18,933 --> 01:07:22,400 I started to question my own perception of reality. 1000 01:07:25,766 --> 01:07:29,800 How do you know what things in your life are real 1001 01:07:29,833 --> 01:07:33,000 and are not real? 1002 01:07:33,033 --> 01:07:34,833 - I can just feel it. 1003 01:07:34,866 --> 01:07:37,000 I have physical sensations in my body, 1004 01:07:37,033 --> 01:07:39,300 and I've had enough experiences 1005 01:07:39,333 --> 01:07:43,966 where I know it's not real 1006 01:07:44,000 --> 01:07:46,733 and thought it was. 1007 01:07:46,766 --> 01:07:49,333 I know when it's not real now. 1008 01:07:49,366 --> 01:07:52,166 I can feel it. 1009 01:08:22,533 --> 01:08:29,600 ♪ 1010 01:09:02,766 --> 01:09:09,833 ♪ 1011 01:09:25,100 --> 01:09:27,600 - Have you caught anything? 1012 01:09:27,633 --> 01:09:29,966 - No. 1013 01:09:30,000 --> 01:09:31,933 - I brought you some fish. 1014 01:09:31,966 --> 01:09:34,966 - Are you serious? 1015 01:09:35,000 --> 01:09:37,066 Aw. 1016 01:09:46,133 --> 01:09:49,466 - My relationship with Dylan is, like, 1017 01:09:49,500 --> 01:09:52,166 boyfriend-girlfriend, I would say. 1018 01:09:52,200 --> 01:09:55,033 He finds so much beauty on the street. 1019 01:09:55,066 --> 01:09:57,366 It's so special that I get to see through his eyes 1020 01:09:57,400 --> 01:10:00,100 directly how it is. 1021 01:10:00,133 --> 01:10:03,833 So we love each other a lot, 1022 01:10:03,866 --> 01:10:07,266 but we live a lifestyle that constantly changes, 1023 01:10:07,300 --> 01:10:11,700 or we like when it changes, and we love loving people. 1024 01:10:16,133 --> 01:10:18,033 After experiencing this, 1025 01:10:18,066 --> 01:10:19,733 I feel like I won't be able to, 1026 01:10:19,766 --> 01:10:23,500 like, live a quote-unquote, like, normal life ever again. 1027 01:10:27,900 --> 01:10:30,866 I don't see Dylan as mentally ill. 1028 01:10:30,900 --> 01:10:33,966 We think very imaginatively. 1029 01:10:34,000 --> 01:10:37,100 I think that's why we get along so well. 1030 01:10:37,133 --> 01:10:39,166 Maybe he's mentally ill 1031 01:10:39,200 --> 01:10:42,533 because he doesn't want to be part of the status quo, 1032 01:10:42,566 --> 01:10:44,333 but that's not mentally ill. 1033 01:10:44,366 --> 01:10:46,866 It's just a different opinion. 1034 01:10:46,900 --> 01:10:53,966 ♪ 1035 01:11:25,466 --> 01:11:27,500 - Over the next few days, 1036 01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:29,666 I met some of Dylan's homeless friends. 1037 01:11:29,700 --> 01:11:32,633 - What's going on, bro? How you doing, my man? 1038 01:11:32,666 --> 01:11:36,366 - Many of them shared Dylan's experience. 1039 01:11:36,400 --> 01:11:40,233 How long have you been living this kind of lifestyle? 1040 01:11:40,266 --> 01:11:45,466 - On and off for a lot of years. 1041 01:11:45,500 --> 01:11:47,033 I have OCD. 1042 01:11:47,066 --> 01:11:49,833 It makes it difficult to-- I mean, I can do education, 1043 01:11:49,866 --> 01:11:53,100 but as far as balancing the things of the workforce, 1044 01:11:53,133 --> 01:11:54,666 the life place, it's-- 1045 01:11:54,700 --> 01:11:56,966 I'm pretty much incapable of doing that, 1046 01:11:57,000 --> 01:11:59,533 so this is a lifestyle I can do. 1047 01:11:59,566 --> 01:12:02,333 - I had some experiences with voices. 1048 01:12:02,366 --> 01:12:03,766 I had little tricksters. 1049 01:12:03,800 --> 01:12:05,100 They would either laugh at me, 1050 01:12:05,133 --> 01:12:06,633 tell me good things, bad things, 1051 01:12:06,666 --> 01:12:08,766 and then there was tricksters, and you'd hear the giggling, 1052 01:12:08,800 --> 01:12:10,833 and like, I'd be, like, taking a shower. 1053 01:12:10,866 --> 01:12:12,400 "Shut off the water and save--you know, 1054 01:12:12,433 --> 01:12:15,633 and save water." You know, I'm like, "Okay." 1055 01:12:15,666 --> 01:12:17,433 - And then they're like, "Look at how stupid she is. 1056 01:12:17,466 --> 01:12:18,733 She just turned off the water." 1057 01:12:18,766 --> 01:12:20,166 - I know. Right! 1058 01:12:20,200 --> 01:12:22,500 It goes on and on and on and on. 1059 01:12:22,533 --> 01:12:24,300 - Yeah. - And finally you put yourself 1060 01:12:24,333 --> 01:12:26,733 in a corner and, like, cover your head start crying, 1061 01:12:26,766 --> 01:12:27,900 balling your eyes out like, 1062 01:12:27,933 --> 01:12:29,700 "What did I do wrong this time?" 1063 01:12:29,733 --> 01:12:34,466 My confidence, you know, like, went to crap. 1064 01:12:34,500 --> 01:12:37,300 - If you tell any doctor that you hear things 1065 01:12:37,333 --> 01:12:39,400 and see things that other people can't, 1066 01:12:39,433 --> 01:12:41,100 then that's schizo effective. 1067 01:12:41,133 --> 01:12:43,000 That's just what they're gonna say, 1068 01:12:43,033 --> 01:12:46,366 so some people are very afraid of that word. 1069 01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:48,933 I don't even like to use that word "schizophrenia" 1070 01:12:48,966 --> 01:12:51,366 just for that reason. 1071 01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:53,666 I'm sensitive to other energies and forces 1072 01:12:53,700 --> 01:12:55,766 in this world that are real. 1073 01:12:55,800 --> 01:12:58,100 I'm not mentally ill. 1074 01:12:58,133 --> 01:13:01,000 I'm really just experiencing stuff 1075 01:13:01,033 --> 01:13:03,400 that's in the ether that most people can't see. 1076 01:13:08,400 --> 01:13:12,900 - It was difficult for me to imagine their states of mind. 1077 01:13:12,933 --> 01:13:15,533 I wanted to understand Dylan's mind better, 1078 01:13:15,566 --> 01:13:18,600 so I asked him if he could visualize 1079 01:13:18,633 --> 01:13:21,466 some of his experiences for me. 1080 01:13:21,500 --> 01:13:23,233 Dylan came up with the idea 1081 01:13:23,266 --> 01:13:27,100 to recreate moments of mental trauma from his past. 1082 01:13:27,133 --> 01:13:28,833 He invited his homeless friends 1083 01:13:28,866 --> 01:13:31,000 to create the reenactments. 1084 01:13:34,333 --> 01:13:38,133 - Yeah. - Yesterday and today, man-- 1085 01:13:38,166 --> 01:13:41,666 So if everyone can just find a random book, 1086 01:13:41,700 --> 01:13:46,333 take a book, and just use your intuition. 1087 01:13:46,366 --> 01:13:48,466 Somebody will set their chair close to me, 1088 01:13:48,500 --> 01:13:50,266 and they'll just start reading aloud 1089 01:13:50,300 --> 01:13:52,500 just, you know, quietly, 1090 01:13:52,533 --> 01:13:55,066 and I get confused and distracted, 1091 01:13:55,100 --> 01:13:59,300 and then it will just go around in a circle like that. 1092 01:13:59,333 --> 01:14:01,133 - I got one question though. - Yeah? 1093 01:14:01,166 --> 01:14:04,633 - What is the name of the movie? 1094 01:14:04,666 --> 01:14:06,166 - "I'm Another You." 1095 01:14:06,200 --> 01:14:09,000 - "I'm Another You?" - Yeah. 1096 01:14:09,033 --> 01:14:11,033 - That describes schizophrenia pretty well. 1097 01:14:11,066 --> 01:14:12,866 - Yeah, well, I mean, you know, 1098 01:14:12,900 --> 01:14:15,600 I'm grateful that all of you are here for this 1099 01:14:15,633 --> 01:14:18,933 because, you know, I hate to use the word 1100 01:14:18,966 --> 01:14:21,733 "schizophrenic" or "bipolar" or anything like that 1101 01:14:21,766 --> 01:14:25,933 because we're really just empathic sensitive people 1102 01:14:25,966 --> 01:14:29,066 that don't fit in to this whole machine. 1103 01:14:29,100 --> 01:14:32,233 We're really-- we're really emotional, 1104 01:14:32,266 --> 01:14:35,000 and we see things other people can't see, 1105 01:14:35,033 --> 01:14:39,100 and it's important, so I'm glad you guys are here. 1106 01:14:39,133 --> 01:14:41,566 - Right on, brother. 1107 01:14:59,800 --> 01:15:03,533 - The homeless are close to the streets, to the pavement, 1108 01:15:03,566 --> 01:15:05,666 the curbs, and the gutters, 1109 01:15:05,700 --> 01:15:09,633 concrete, the litter, the sewer, the sewer lids, 1110 01:15:09,666 --> 01:15:12,100 the fire hydrants and wastebaskets 1111 01:15:12,133 --> 01:15:14,933 and the bus stops and the storefronts. 1112 01:15:14,966 --> 01:15:19,766 They move slowly over familiar terrain day after day, 1113 01:15:19,800 --> 01:15:22,833 stopping to talk to each other because time means little. 1114 01:15:22,866 --> 01:15:24,666 - Ready. 1115 01:15:24,700 --> 01:15:28,100 - Stopping to watch a stalled car under hats and caps. 1116 01:15:28,133 --> 01:15:30,166 - A new drug dealer on the corner. 1117 01:15:30,200 --> 01:15:32,233 A strange face on the curb... 1118 01:15:32,266 --> 01:15:33,666 - And like sentries they observe... 1119 01:15:33,700 --> 01:15:35,700 - Sexual images-- - They sit on their sidewalks-- 1120 01:15:35,733 --> 01:15:38,100 - Hidden under hats and caps. 1121 01:15:38,133 --> 01:15:39,833 - One of our clients said... 1122 01:15:41,200 --> 01:15:43,666 - Like sentries they observe-- - Every move-- 1123 01:15:43,700 --> 01:15:45,700 - Sexual images-- - Every move-- 1124 01:15:45,733 --> 01:15:48,533 - Hear the sounds of the streets-- 1125 01:15:48,566 --> 01:15:51,100 - They absorbed the odors of diesel-- 1126 01:15:59,600 --> 01:16:01,900 - They know it-- - Too much of this life-- 1127 01:16:01,933 --> 01:16:05,666 - Guns fired-- - Look at that. 1128 01:16:05,700 --> 01:16:07,800 They had him hogtied, raped him, 1129 01:16:07,833 --> 01:16:09,600 and then put a knife to his chest. 1130 01:16:09,633 --> 01:16:11,100 - Look at him. He's so foolish. 1131 01:16:32,466 --> 01:16:36,066 - I'm openly expressing the most sensitive and-- 1132 01:16:36,100 --> 01:16:38,033 things about me. 1133 01:16:38,066 --> 01:16:41,300 If some people understood me, which I know they would, 1134 01:16:41,333 --> 01:16:45,233 I would appreciate that, but this isn't about me. 1135 01:16:45,266 --> 01:16:48,800 Most people with these kind of--with a mind like mine, 1136 01:16:48,833 --> 01:16:51,766 they don't have skills to explain 1137 01:16:51,800 --> 01:16:55,300 or illustrate what's going on actually. 1138 01:16:55,333 --> 01:16:59,066 You asked me if I was homeless by choice, 1139 01:16:59,100 --> 01:17:03,233 and I would've said "yes" 1140 01:17:03,266 --> 01:17:06,466 initially but-- 1141 01:17:06,500 --> 01:17:09,433 because I did make the choice to be homeless, 1142 01:17:09,466 --> 01:17:12,400 but thinking about it on a deeper level, 1143 01:17:12,433 --> 01:17:14,666 it is definitely not a choice. 1144 01:17:14,700 --> 01:17:17,166 How am I supposed to keep a job 1145 01:17:17,200 --> 01:17:20,400 when I have these social paranoias 1146 01:17:20,433 --> 01:17:22,466 and these hallucinations? 1147 01:17:22,500 --> 01:17:27,233 How can I call in sick maybe once or twice a week? 1148 01:17:27,266 --> 01:17:30,833 It's--it's really not feasible. 1149 01:17:30,866 --> 01:17:34,300 By their standards, I'm mentally disabled. 1150 01:17:42,766 --> 01:17:49,866 ♪ 1151 01:17:51,833 --> 01:17:53,933 - I came to Florida to find out 1152 01:17:53,966 --> 01:17:55,866 whether Dylan was mentally ill 1153 01:17:55,900 --> 01:17:58,466 and what his reality was. 1154 01:18:01,233 --> 01:18:03,266 But after understanding the complexities 1155 01:18:03,300 --> 01:18:07,500 of his mental health, addiction, and homelessness, 1156 01:18:07,533 --> 01:18:11,100 the question had become less important. 1157 01:18:11,133 --> 01:18:13,500 How do you spell your name? 1158 01:18:13,533 --> 01:18:16,100 - D-Y-L-A-N. 1159 01:18:16,133 --> 01:18:18,033 - Dylan? - Dylan. 1160 01:18:18,066 --> 01:18:21,833 - I had seen how the mind can build prisons for itself. 1161 01:18:24,166 --> 01:18:27,266 I had seen through people's treatment of Dylan 1162 01:18:27,300 --> 01:18:30,033 how they were limited by their perception. 1163 01:18:30,066 --> 01:18:32,366 - You see, you and I, like, we don't differ all that much. 1164 01:18:32,400 --> 01:18:33,566 - Yeah. 1165 01:18:33,600 --> 01:18:35,700 - I'm just fascinated, so what made you-- 1166 01:18:35,733 --> 01:18:39,066 like, did someone else do this that you decided to do it or-- 1167 01:18:39,100 --> 01:18:41,133 - I like him, you know? 1168 01:18:41,166 --> 01:18:42,500 And like, he's a funny cat, man. 1169 01:18:42,533 --> 01:18:45,700 You know, he's young. He's finding himself. 1170 01:18:45,733 --> 01:18:48,266 - I see Dylan's face 1171 01:18:48,300 --> 01:18:51,733 in every homeless person that I see. 1172 01:18:51,766 --> 01:18:58,833 ♪ 1173 01:19:05,100 --> 01:19:08,200 - I came to the U.S. in 2011. 1174 01:19:11,766 --> 01:19:14,933 I followed Dylan hoping to find something 1175 01:19:14,966 --> 01:19:17,366 I've been searching for all my life. 1176 01:19:20,233 --> 01:19:22,733 Along the way I've learned 1177 01:19:22,766 --> 01:19:24,966 what I've been searching for 1178 01:19:25,000 --> 01:19:28,100 exists only in the mind. 1179 01:19:28,133 --> 01:19:34,300 ♪ 1180 01:19:34,333 --> 01:19:37,800 - What else is there besides this endless kisses 1181 01:19:37,833 --> 01:19:40,966 from Mrs. Bliss herself, 1182 01:19:41,000 --> 01:19:44,900 escaping the clasp of the second hand's ticking task 1183 01:19:44,933 --> 01:19:48,700 kicking back the flask to bask with no mask. 1184 01:19:48,733 --> 01:19:52,233 Wherever he goes, he leaves an echo to show. 1185 01:19:52,266 --> 01:19:54,166 From the pitter-patter of his feet 1186 01:19:54,200 --> 01:19:57,233 to the magic incantation he speaks, 1187 01:19:57,266 --> 01:20:00,733 a man from the past living in the present 1188 01:20:00,766 --> 01:20:03,900 so his presence is living in the future, 1189 01:20:03,933 --> 01:20:06,066 yesterday, and tomorrow. 1190 01:20:06,100 --> 01:20:08,733 Last week was seven years long. 1191 01:20:08,766 --> 01:20:13,066 The only thought in his mind was the singing bird's song. 1192 01:20:13,100 --> 01:20:17,100 He only sought the things that the whole world forgot. 1193 01:20:17,133 --> 01:20:19,866 I am he. He is me. 1194 01:20:19,900 --> 01:20:23,333 If you only knew he is another you. 1195 01:20:23,366 --> 01:20:30,433 ♪ 1196 01:21:39,733 --> 01:21:40,900 ♪ ♪